BBC RADIO OXFORD

 

‘Taking Risks and Making Changes’

 

Jenny Gould on the afternoon show

 

 

IS THERE SOMETHING YOU WANT TO CHANGE BUT IT FEELS TOO RISKY? Would you like a new career, to start a business, a better social life, to end a relationship, move house, move country, learn a new skill or hobby?  Here are a few tips …

 

• Are you afraid of failing?  Failure is part of learning. Be positive, but realistic.  What’s the worst that could happen? if doesn’t work out – it’s not the end of the world!  No risk - no progress.

 

• Perfectionism – the impossible goal. Only willing to try if you know it will be perfect?  Perfectionism makes us crazy.  Forget ‘perfect’.

 

• What’s holding you back?  Are the obstacles real or imagined?

Face your fears - don’t avoid them. Go on, be brave!  You have so much more potential than you could ever realise!

 

• Listen to your body – is this a natural fear of change or a real ‘gut’ feeling? Fear of this kind is more likely to involve lots of mental activity, whereas a gut feeling is exactly that – a horrible heavy feeling in your gut. If it’s the latter – go with it!

 

• Negative beliefs - challenge that little gremlin whispering in your ear.  He likes things to stay as they are!  Don’t listen!

 

• We have more control than we think. Remember the famous prayer: ‘God give me the serenity to accept things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference’

 

• There are no certainties, no absolute guarantees in life. Things are constantly changing – don’t be paralysed by indecision.

 

• What do YOU want – are you thinking ‘I should’, ‘I ought to, ‘I have to’..? Is this what someone else wants? Who’s in the driving seat?

 

• Break goals down into small steps – make a plan.  What can you do next week towards that goal?

 

• Get all the information you can.  Talk to people who can help you. And ask 3 people you can trust what they think you should do.

 

• Write down what you want in vivid detail and imagine it often.

 

• Write down the advantages and the disadvantages… both for the short term  and the long term

 

• Imagine you’ve done it. On a scale of 1-10 for each option, how does it feel?

 

• Look ahead. Imagine you don’t do this – how will you feel in 5 years time? They say we’re most likely to regret the things we didn’t do!